For Agnes!

Monday, January 24, 2011

Back to my soul after a long break indeed! I know, 2011 has started and January is half way through. This is my 1st post in 2011 and 101 th overall. So happy new year to all you readers and writers out there.

India trip was awesome. One month just passed by. Other things are same as they were. While in India, i hardly visited my blog, so all my fellow bloggers, i am yet to catch up on your December posts.

After coming back to Singapore, when i first visited my blog, browsed through the updates from my blogger friends. I had mixed emotions when i saw an update from Agnes, one of my favorite bloggers. She was struggling with her husband's cancer for last few months and had hardly updated her blog. Her title update said, 16th Jan....which didn't give me any good or bad news. I was nervous to click on the link and didn't want to see anything that i didn't want to know about. I was scared for her like she is my childhood friend, my family or somebody who i have known forever. Surprisingly none of this is true. I have known her, her husband, her cats, her dresses, her boots, her purses and everything about her, through her one stop blog. I don't know how i got so attached through words, only words. Finally i gathered the courage to visit her page and saw what i hated to see. One picture, him and her, and one line which said, "He died in my arms". I broke into tears, lots of tears, unstoppable tears. Mandar was worried because he kept asking and i never said a word, just cried, for a long time.

Agnes,

I didn't want to blog about this, was going to send you an email instead. However, the hundred times i visited my blog to write something after that day, i couldn't. I was just so emotional every single time i saw your name on my page. I couldn't. So this is my attempt to support you in your hard time and get over my mental block and clear my mind.

I know how positive, how creative, how strong, how different of a girl you are. I hate to see you tearing apart. So this post is to help you gain your strength.

Love you. Be strong!
Shalmalee

3 comments:

Prashanti :) said...

I had the same reaction to her post on that day, Shalmalee. Somehow, I was dreading that post and I knew clicking that link would somehow make it final. I hope she finds strength in something in life. Enough strength for her to carry on.

Reflections said...

I had clicked on the link without a seconds thought and the one line just smashed thru me. I just sat there & cried so much.

U've written it so beautifully....ur emotions explained without any frills. At times like this I just dry up and my fingers dont move.

Reflections said...

Today when I went to her page ur comment was below mine & tht how I landed here.