Desire....

A chunk of things to do and bundle of desires to complete. Desire is something you never want to give up on...but you have to sometimes. Practical world deals with technology, research, work places, discussions, meetings, timings and lot more things which seem to organize life in a way or so. What organization can you imply and apply to your daily needs if you don't have the desire to?
If i say i don't like to work round the clock on the stuff that i am doing, you might interpret me in a wrong way. You might start thinking that i am a girl with less capabilities, few abilities, lots and lots of laziness pouring out, not a work freak or what Americans call it as a workaholic....I don't care what you think but i feel the need to explain how am i suffocated throughout my life in getting a good education , building an excellent career, being just more than perfect on the time frame of my one time life....i feel disgusted at this point when i think that i have achieved tons of things which don't belong to me or i can put it in a better way saying "i don't belong to them".
Why is it always that you have to flow with the stream...why cant the stream take your turn and flow according to you? Those were the people who first made the water take this direction and we are the idiots following them and spending our entire lives preserving there way. Why do i care for such a stranger who made this unknown path for me and why do i have to follow it?
I ask myself then....hey GIRL, do you even have your own way to start with, do you even have the guts to go along your own path? Frankly, I don't know....but yes, i know the things i am good at....may be few, i have some strong points and i remember the moments when i saw this Amir khan film..."Taare Zameen Par"....what an excellent creation! Ya.... that was the day when i recognized my suffocated soul far more better. I tried helping myself with the one and only truth..."Every Child is Special". Yes it is....it is the truth....it is the blessing ....it is the feeling that i should have got years ago and i would have at least given a thought for a different career.
Ya....you don't want to be in the merit lists, don't want to be the toppers, ranker's to prove your brightness...believe me...you don't want to be good at numbers to be sharp.

Well, i don't want to be a philosopher or something but just wanted to open up today. Here i end up with my very first blog.... My frustration continues....i am taking off now....Got to go!